I can text with my tongue
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Randomize
