Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
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