Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
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