i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
