no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
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