What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
