hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
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