Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
