Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
