Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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