I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
