didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
