So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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