your room smells of hookers.
And success
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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