so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
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