I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
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