I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
