I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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