omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
