It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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