Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
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