i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
