my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Let's paint friendship bongs
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
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