wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
