Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
