i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
