I heard we made out
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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