The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
