You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
