apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
