I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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