I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
