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He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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