I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
