last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
