so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
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