mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
