Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
