Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
He literally asked permission to hit on me
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
