I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
