do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
