Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
