I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
