Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
