i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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