I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
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