if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
