I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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