You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Randomize