There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
